Have You Tried Creating vs Reacting?

Recently, I read another book by Steve Chandler—yes, he is my favorite author—and came across the concept of "Create vs React."

This idea immediately reminded me of a friend of mine who often found himself reacting to events at work. For instance, whenever his boss gave him constructive feedback, he would take it personally, irrespective of the nature of the feedback. He always felt it was too overly direct, disrespectful or even dramatic, triggering an emotional and defensive response.

Before I introduced him to the concept of "Create vs React," his default reaction was to feel hurt, get defensive and even consider quitting his job.

Once I shared this particular concept with him, everything shifted.

The next time he found himself in a similar situation, he paused and asked himself, "What do I want to create in this situation?" This simple question put control back in his hands. He realized that instead of reacting emotionally, he could choose to create something different: to become someone who embraces feedback as an opportunity to grow, remains calm under pressure and earns trust. These are the traits of a great leader, something he aspires to be.

Another example: imagine your junior team members aren’t performing at the level you'd like, and you start to feel irritated. One option is to react by getting frustrated, showing your displeasure or even belittling their abilities. Maybe it will even lead you to do the work on your own, making a big workload even larger.

Alternatively, you can ask yourself, "What would I like to create?"In this case, you could create strong leadership by staying calm, assessing why the team isn’t meeting your expectations, identifying the root cause and coaching them to improve, even if this means some extra time and energy from your side. In this second approach, you create opportunities for growth not only for your team but also for yourself. You demonstrate effective leadership, become someone they look up to, and set a standard for how leaders should guide and inspire others.

When we operate from a place of creation instead of reaction, we allow room for growth, learning and positive change. The next time you feel the urge to react to a situation, pause and ask yourself: "What do I want to create here?"